PDD: Public Display of Disaffection

Recent studies show that society is “losing the ability to engage in uninterrupted, focus conversations.” While 68 per cent of people say it is disrespectful to hold a real time conversation with someone and texting someone else at the same time, 32 per cent of New Yorkers still do. The need to constantly check your phone puts both “personal and business relationships at risk.” The younger you are however does directly relate to how much tolerance you have about electronic distraction according to a recent survey that showed ten percent of people under 25 don’t see anything wrong with texting during sex. Lauren Emberson alludes to how society is becoming distracted by just even hearing a one sided conversation or a “half-alogue.” “Our brain is hard-wired to pay attention to the unpredictable,” points out Emberson as she concludes that its “distracting because we try to predict what the person is saying.”

“People are fed up,” with the inappropriate use of cell phones as it has hit an “all time high,” in today’s society. While I admit that I have committed some of these “cell-fishness,” acts I do agree with the author’s message that society has pushed the boundaries of acceptable cell phone usage. I also agree that while the use of technology for or in certain events does “depend on circumstances,” people tend to be blurring the line between respectful and inappropriate. “The distracting glow of PDA screens in theaters,” during performances has increased substantially that I too would applaud Kevin Spacey for yelling “tell them were busy,” during a showing of The Iceman Comenth. Neither the less, this article has made me focus on my own public displays of disaffection and to help me work on regaining my one to one people skills.

Hide and Seek

I’m rifling through the pockets in my mind
       Searching and scouring every nook and cranny trying to remember

            Where did I put it? Where is that old box?

              For inside that anciently aged box holds a book

   The book that captivates my childhood years within it

                                   Throughout my years I have entrusted many memories into that box

Why is it whenever I need it or want it I never can find it?
                               My mind is a mess, cluttered like an abandoned attic

                   The longer and harder I search, the more I am engrossed with defeat

           A light bulb flickers on                                                 Hastily I race to my closet                Tripping and foundering over my other unsuccessful search attempts

Hope and optimism engulfs me

I stumble faster towards the door handle

Turning it quickly I whip open the door

   Piles of boxes tumble out around me as I sort through them

Where is it?

   I rip open box after box praying I finally found the right one

The one holding some of the best years of my life inside its aged pages, forever

       Optimism drains out of me as I sit and ponder

   Where is my yearbook?

"We Owned The Night" Lady Antebellum

Tell me have you ever wanted
Someone so much it hurts?
Your lips keep trying to speak
But you just can't find the words
Well I had this dream once;
I held it in my hands


She was the purest beauty
But not the common kind
She had a way about her
That made you feel alive
And for a moment
We made the world stand still


Yeah, we owned the night


You had me dim the lights;
You danced just like a child
The wine spilled on your dress


And all you did was smile
Yeah, it was perfect
I hold it in my mind


Yeah, we owned the night


When the summer rolls around
And the sun starts sinking down
I still remember you
Oh, I remember you
And I wonder where you are


Are you looking at those same stars again?
Do you remember when?


We woke under a blanket
All tangled up in skin
Not knowing in that moment
We'd never speak again
But it was perfect;
I never will forget
When we owned the night


Yeah, we owned the night

Lady Antebellum wrote "We Owned the Night," to recall on the emotions the artists experienced from a past memory of loving "the purest beauty," and a memorable night they had once shared together. With the use of many poetic terms they bring this memory to life in the listener's mind. He talks about this dream he once had saying how "[he] held it in [his] hands," using personification as he could not actually hold the dream in his hand but the idea of a dream.  "You danced just like a child," is a simile that described how her dancing was carefree and intoxicated with joy. Parell structure such as "You had me dim the lights; You danced just like a child,"  is used to help the song flow smoothly together as well as to accentuate the setting and tone of the song. "We owned the night," is repeated several times throughout the song to emphasized how invincible they had felt. An apostrophe is brought into the song as he asked the girl, who is absent from his life, if she was "looking at those same stars again," like they once had. A paradoxical line they used is when he talked about being "all tangled up in skin," because while it is impossible to tangle their own skin up, it isn't impossible to tangle their bodies up with one another. This song makes listeners revive memories of their own past lovers and meaningful nights they once had together.

Fairy Tales versus Reality

           Fairy tales are causing havoc on modern day relationships, making girls believe they can wait around for their prince and then having unrealistic expectations for them to uphold. In Forget Prince Charming by June Callwood, she preaches to her granddaughters that they should have sensible expectations and stresses the point of not demanding too much of their companion because “no human relationship is friction free.” Alice Major uses satire to criticize the expectations men have of women due to these fairy tales in Puce Fairy Book. She exposes the flaws society has created by looking to these "[ladies] sleeping in a garden," and "waiting in [towers]," as role models and idealistic wives and partners. In both of these passages the authors attempt to break down the barrier of expectations and high demands these fairy tales have established.

The “oceanic feeling,” of love people experience as they start dating, while still an astounding sensation, is just “the temporary insanity,” of feelings like you have found the perfect mate. This is what June Callwood attempts to explain to her granddaughters in Forget Prince Charming. She advises them to have expectations, but not superficial and unrealistic ones that no one can live up to and to realize that no relationship is 50-50. She attempts to steer their thinking towards relationships as “a mutual ability to compromise.” She also advise them to look past their looks and first appearances and try find admirable characteristic traits such as trust, loyalty and honor in a potential partner. Another key aspect Callwood believes that helps contribute to a well bonded relationship is a sense of humor that “springs from awareness of life’s absurdities.” While she encourages her granddaughters to search for this mate with their head she admits that the "pounding heart is not always an idiot," and they also need to go on instinct sometimes to help lead them to the right decision and find their "inner wisdom," as well.

            “You wanted Rapunzel waiting in a tower braids of hair like ropes," this sums up how fairytales have created a unrealistic outlook that men should look for in women. Alice Major the author of Puce Fairy Book tries to break through the barrier of these expectations by saying how modern day women don’t expect to be brought a “crystal slipper on a heart-shaped pillow,” and sometimes “[forget] to water the roses round the door.” Women don’t want the pressure of living up to these expectations laid out for them by a story book character. They have had other "princes through...[their] forest,"  and not just been lounging around waiting and praying for their perfect mate to come rescue them. Even if the man was her "one true prince," and he had exceedingly high expectations that she couldn't possibly live up to, she would in fact turn him down out of self respect for herself. 

            Alice Major would agree with June Callwood in the case of modern day relationship expectations as both authors pointed out the unrealistic expectations both males and females have on each other . Major would concur with Callwood’s statement that “Prince Charming… is a narcissistic dope," because in her poem she criticizes how the men expects ladies to meet these absurd standards. Callwood would agree with Major's statement of no women should “[cut] off [her] toe,” just because of a man would want her to. Both authors are aware that while "some matters are not negotiable," couples need to be able to compromise while having realistic expectations of one another, in order to make a long term relationship last.